“The Man Who Lives in My Night”

“The Man Who Lives in My Night”

After he leaves her for another woman,
after he teaches her to believe
she is no longer worthy
of love,
of being chosen,
of being his first smile at dawn,
or the quiet echo before his morning thought.

She replaces him with pain,
an old companion,
someone who whispered her name in the dark.
It stays with her through the long nights,
faithful in ways he was not.
She does not trade it for sunlight.
Pain knows her address,
memorizing her phone number.

She learns to stand with the ache.
Not despising its qualities.
a familiar presence in quiet moments,
an inescapable force in her dreaming hours.
She learns to live with it,
learning new rhythms,
carving quiet spaces between the two.

He is the only one who did not leave.
She keeps the hurt like a vow.
not because it is holy,
but because it is familiar.
In her world,
he is the lover who stayed,
faithful as the ache,
her only inheritance of the night.

Every smile she borrows,
every drop of joy,
does not truly belong to her.
Temporary,
a gift borrowed from a daylight,
nor imagine another future.
She settles into the deep darkness,
not wishing for the light,
nor even the peace that follows the ache.

Her pain lives in the silence.
She carries its weight as if it were
her name,
her identity,
her inheritance,
and somehow,
it becomes her freedom,
folded inside the ache.

He is the man who lives in my night.

“Pain Is Not My Name”

“Pain Is Not My Name”

Pain has become her identity.
Yet hope remains beautiful,
even when misplaced,
even when it keeps old wounds breathing.

She gives meaning to her romantic pain,
turning heartbreak into a sacred story.

She does not date with her heart.
She bonds with her soul.
She carries her own pain
and the pain of the one who left
without a goodbye.

Still, she remains emotionally on call for him.
Her body misses attachment.
Her heart misses familiarity.
Yet she resists the truth:
he no longer chooses her.

She loved without limits,
without the boundaries romance requires.
She lingered in pain too long,
until she became the wounded lover,
until sorrow stared back from the mirror,
until depression began to feel like home.

But she will learn:
loving does not mean enduring.
Love does not require self-erasure.

Love can change form.
Love does not have to become a prison.
If love is not serving her healing,
if it is not feeding her soul,
she must release it.

She must choose freedom over memory,
emotional growth over attachment,
future over familiarity,
life over loss.

“Where Our Eyes No Longer Meet”

“Where Our Eyes No Longer Meet”

How am I supposed to go on
without you?
You slipped into distance,
into a place where our eyes will no longer meet,
where our gazes cannot find each other anymore.

I will miss your smile,
the way it greeted me at dawn,
arriving before my first morning breath,
my words whispering your name
across the room.
I will miss your voice
when you are not near,
especially in the quiet moments
when we are just by ourselves,
when I reach for you
and you are not there.

I will miss holding your hand,
letting my fingers memorize your face,
learning again and again
the language of your skin,
breathing in the familiar scent of your body.

I am still trying to understand
how love can ask someone to forget,
to leave without thinking twice,
how two hearts can stand at a crossroads—
the crossroads of joy and pain—
and choose different futures.
I loved you beyond forever,
if such a place even still exists
in our world.

Are you leaving to find freedom,
to forget what once held us together?
Or are you going away to escape
the presence of our love?

Maybe this love was not meant to stay forever,
but it was real while it lived.
Maybe what we shared was not permanent,
but it was true while it breathed.
And even if it could not last,
it was strong enough
to leave a forever-shaped space
inside of us.